Every Monday morning, Mr Magic’s show has a section called Hlaziya ipolitiki ngolimi lwakho (Analyse Politics in your Language). This morning, I caught the show in time to record it, and have since transcribed it, selected some choice bits, and translated them here for you (with some attention to discourse, as usual).

Each of these sections is taken from what Mnumzane Mntaka said this morning, on the topic of assessing our president.

Oh, and the subject of today’s show was JZ and the Guptas. In case you weren’t sick enough of the whole sordid mess.

I

uMengameli wethu unef’ elimnyama, alenza amabhomu naye, ngoba yena akafuni ukuthi ulelwa nentwala

Our President has a black cloud (over him), not of his own making, because he does not want ‘to be inhabited (lain-upon) by lice’.

II

Bacabanga ukuthi nxa bepheth’ igama, suke yonke iminyango izovulela.

They think that if they wield the name, suddenly all doors will open for them.

III

Ngeshwa lakhe-ke, Sotobe, lapha kwepolitiki, ilabehlulile, k’khona umahluleli wepolitiki ohlangene nezomthetho, bese kubakhona umehluleli womlando, okuwona-ke ogoqa konke.

Because of his ill-fortune, o you of the clan of The-Great-Masher, here in politics, judgement has long been cast, as there’s the adjudicator of Politics that is of one substance with the-affairs-of-scolding (aka Law), then there is the judge of history, in which all that is done is gathered and rolled up (also, ‘all things are parried or warded off’, as well as ‘the door or gate has been bolted’).

IIIa

Isibonelo: uMengameli uMandela, ngokwepolitiki, umengameli owasilethela inkululeko, wayengumengameli wokuqala, kepha ngokomlando yowahlulela njengomongameli owagibeza abelungu phezu kwamakhand’ethu ngoba bedelela-nje. kungenxa abantu abanjengoMandela bakwazi ukuthi babeqhubel’ indlela.

A good example: President Mandela. Politically, the president who brought us freedom, who was the first president – however historically he shall be judged as the president who saddled us with the black-and-white-beast-people (aka the Whites) over our heads, because they were just contemptfully unconcerned with us. It is because of people like Mandela that they (the abelungu) knew that they might continue along the same paths as before.

IIIb

uThabo Mbeki, ngokwezepolitiki, waziwa njengomongameli owayeyimisa ubucopho, incwiphishi yangempela endabeni yase-Afrika nasomnotho, kodwa ngokomlando waziwa njengomuntu owanqabela abantu ikhambi lengculazi ngaleso-sikhathi bedinga ngaso.

Thabo Mbeki, politically, known as the president who set himself up intellectually, a real expert on matters relating to Africa and the economy, but historically known as the person who denied people medicines for the affliction-like-a–great-spear (AIDS) at the time when they needed it.

IIIc

NoZuma-ke, ngokwepolitiki waziwa njengenguluzane, ekade babebayishaya bese iphumelela, kepha ngokomlando (ngeshwa lakhe), usewaziwa njengomongameli owangenisa abantu bakwaGupta owagibeza obohlanga lwamandiya phezu kwethu sibhekile.

And Zuma, politically known as the inguluzane (help needed here, no reference to it anywhere I can find), which they have long been striking and yet it succeeds, however historically (by his ill-fortune), is now known as the president who brought in the Gupta people and who saddled those of the Indian race over our heads, while we were awake and looking on.

IV

Yikho ngithi ngeshwa ibengayisho ngonyak’ odlule abantu abaseduze kwakhe naye qobo usilukile ukuyivimba. ngeke sayivimba, ngisho njengoba bangayikhipha imibiko, nabanye bayakhipha imibiko, umlando usemahlulela, Sotobe – useyohlala-nje ngoba bayamthanda kopha umlando usumqedile.

For this reason I say ‘by his ill-fortune’ – because I said last year that those near him (and he himself) had set themselves on the defensive. He will no longer defend himself, even if they release reports, and others release reports, history is now judging him, o you of the clan of The-Great-Masher – he will stay now because they like him, but history is finished with him.

V

Ngalokhu ukusebenzisa igama lakhe, kuchaza ukuthi abantu abaseduze kwakhe abamtshen’ into yangempela bamtshen’ into efuna ukuyizwa ethandayo. Abantu abaseduze kwakhe kufuneka bamtshen’ ukuthi, ‘uneququ ukuthi usetshenziswa kwamaNdiya, abantu abakuthandi lokho, abantu bayakwenyanya lokho’, lokho sekwenzeka bakwaGupta-ke sekwenze kwagcwaliseka inkulumo ebikhulunyelwa ematshwaleni nezinkulumo ebiyikhulunywa-nje zimbangi zakhe.

Regarding this use of his name, it shows that the people near him aren’t telling him real things, but are rather telling him what he wants to hear, or what he prefers. The people near him need to tell him that ‘ listen, you smell like a billy goat (alternatively ‘a strong, unpleasant smell’, ‘a bad odour, as from the armpit’) because you’re being used by the Indians, people don’t like this, people have an aversion to you (or else they’re nauseated by you, as they are by the smell of faeces, ukunya)’, and this that happened with the Guptas makes the conversations that are happening in the beer-drinking-places to fill up, as well as those things being said by his rivals’.

VI

Yikho ngithi, Sotobe, ngisho maqhamuka luphi uphenyo, lithi akuyena, lithi akubona, yebo angaphumelela kwezepolitiki nakwezomthetho okuthiwa kuyena, kodwa ngomlando usamahlulela.

For this reason, o you of the clan of The-Great-Masher, no matter what investigation appears, saying that it wasn’t him, or not them – yes, he can even succeed politically and legally even if it’s said that it’s him, but history is still judging him.